Mad Libs Round 2

Dear Uncle,

I am having an informative time at camp. The counselor is erotic and the food is like rainbows filled with regret. I met Shawntell and we became surprisingly ugly friends. Unfortunately, Shawntell is ungodly and I gyrated my thongs so we couldn't go spritzing the lawn like everybody else. I need more twerks and a floor-length muumuu sharpener, so please unapologetically shart more when you fist me back.

Your cousin,
Billy the Dwarf.

3 Word Inspirations

Recently in a writing class we were asked to write down an '-ing' action, a body part and an inanimate object to insert into a mad lib-type sentence, then expand the sentence into an extra short story, surreal or otherwise. The person to my left gave me these words:

That's what she said.

 Then I wrote this down:

      After a long day of gesticulating, he had discovered his clavicle had grown into an armchair - the cushion of which needed replacing. No, not because it was dirty or worn out, but rather because it didn't match the color palette of his living room - a most important space in which he held many Trivial Pursuit™ tournaments for his cats. Now they sat unwittingly upon him, clawing at his fabric without a care, only hoping to be fed soon. The eldest among them, Frank quickly grew tired and, turning around to find a comfortable spot, laid down on the man's face. When the man had awoken, his eyes had disappeared. He wanted to die. So many regrets.

Fin

I think it has movie potential.